Friday, January 28, 2011


I think Peanut has the hiccups right now.  It's the first time I've felt them.  Like little flicks all perfectly in rhythm.  Hee hee hee - that's funny.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

A decade in review

Ten years ago, I was Unifried.

Nine years ago, I was planning a trip to Italy with one of my bestest friends.  And I was trying to maintain a grip on reality in a place where that was becoming increasingly more difficult.  I still bear the scars.

Eight years ago, I was playing a princess in a comedy that affected me quite seriously at the time.  I was weeping over Lord of the Rings and feeling like I was nearing the end of my own quest.  I was in love, even though it was only for a short time - it was what I needed.

Seven years ago, I was recovering - indulging in well-earned laziness.  I was unhappy with where I was at at the time (Los Angeles), but full of bright hope for the future (in Colorado).  And hope is a powerful thing.

Six years ago, I was incredibly, cripplingly lonely.  I made the decision to change my life.  I hired a personal trainer and cancelled anything to do with television.  I took charge of my own happiness.  I decided not to be a passenger in life any longer.

Five years ago, to the day, I stood on top of my first fourteener with a dear friend, who truly believed that I would have no trouble doing it.  I began training for triathlons.

Four years ago, I had met the love of my life, my partner, my teammate, my soulmate... and we had mentioned marriage for the first time.  He dressed me up and took me out for dinner.  Then we went hiking in the snow in New Hampshire.

Three years ago, I was two weeks away from being engaged.  And I was slowly realizing that Houston was not the place I wanted to live and that "astronaut" was not something I wanted to be, yet.

Two years ago, I was planning a wedding and compiling travel archives from some crazy international adventures (that last part is ongoing).

Last year, I was trying to figure out what kind of house I wanted to buy.  And pretty unhappy with the state of my job.

Today, I am 26 weeks (and 3 days) pregnant with my son.  My husband and I just spent all evening exchanging stories about our days at work and now we're sitting on the couch having computer time, but my foot is still touching his leg.  There's a fire in the wood stove of our lovely mountain home.  I'm exhausted from my exciting job - doing something I like in a field I have always wanted to work in.  And I went to yoga tonight, so my body feels all loose and limber and worked out.

I have done so much.  But more than that, I have come so, so far.  Farewell, twenties -- I think I sucked all the marrow out of life that I could have.  Tomorrow I'll be thirty, and somehow, even though I'm in the midst of so much, it seems like a new beginning.

There's nothing like stepping across a threshold and realizing that you are thoroughly ready to do so.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

in the club

I try and get to a prenatal yoga class on Thursday nights.  I say "try" because I think I'd be optimistic if I said I got there 50% of the time, but whatever.  It's the thought that counts.  

So I went this Thursday.  There were four girls there including me, and we were 23 weeks, 24 weeks, 30 weeks, and 35 weeks.  We all were sporting these cute little bumps.  As we practiced our deep frog squats with our backs at the wall, facing each other into the room, hands in anjali mudra at heart center, and practicing kegels at the same time, we were talking.  The two ladies with children and the instructor were talking about past births.  The two of us first timers were talking about birth  hopes and plans.  

And as I sat there in this circle of women, I felt, for the first time, like a part of this club.  Like I really belonged here with them.  That we could bond over discussions of our pereniums and cervixes.  And along with it a more primal feeling - that I was now joining the billions upon billions of human women who, throughout history, sat in circles, talking about birth stories and birth hopes.

And now I was in their club.

Why now?  Why, randomly, at 24 weeks?  I have been going to the yoga class (with my flat-ish stomach) since I was 5 weeks along.  I haven't passed a milestone or rite of passage, like birth.  

But I guess, having the bump has made me prouder, more aware, and more constantly conscious that yes, this is real, there is a small person - a separate being - there inside of me.  It hasn't seemed real until now.  Despite all the kicks in the bladder.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Babymoon 2.0

We have spent this weekend in San Juan, Puerto Rico.  And yes, we did fly via Phoenix, LA, and DC to get here (in response to the question my coworkers asked: "Is this about miles?").  But I actually find these quick weekend trips to be more relaxing than our big vacations - the pressure is off to pack in sightseeing, even if we do some.  And we tend to spend a lot of time chilling out at the hotel, in this case the Intercontinental, with nights for free earned in a promotion.

Peanut doesn't really like redeye flights - he hasn't been kicking my guts as much the past couple days.  I think he's confused about what time zone we're in and when he's supposed to be awake.

Oh!  But he kicked me right then, so maybe he knows I'm talking about him.  It was an "I'm fine, MOM." kind of kick.  :oP

Travis decided that he wanted to "officially" blog the trip on the travel blog, so here's the link for that:

Saturday, January 8, 2011

A Fresh Beginning

At the risk of sounding too much like Mr. Collins, let me begin with my reasons for blogging.

I used to keep a LiveJournal, and kept at it fairly regularly, but then I met Travis, lost all grip on reality and was too busy falling in love to spend silly time on a blog.  I have kept subject-specific blogs on our (major) travel adventures and our outdoor adventures in the meantime, but I began this blog when we moved into our house back in March.  Our little family of two was settling down and it seemed like a good time to start writing about our life.

In secret, though, I was creating this blog to be a family blog.  We were planning to start trying for a baby in early summer, and I had visions of blogging my family, as I was so inspired to do by Laura, Lara, and Kathy.  So I started it and found some things to post about our house and living up in the hills as we do.  But really I was just waiting until we started trying.

And then we did start trying, and it was such a private, personal process, that I didn't much want to put it out there to share with everyone.  I know there are people that do, and I really appreciate that, because I read them while we were in the process.  But it really wasn't for me.  So I thought, well, I'll wait until I am pregnant!

But I suppose I didn't realize all the secrets that one keeps when one is pregnant: first to share the news slowly, then finding out the gender, not to mention all the awesome bodily functionality you never knew you had...

In the meantime, I've been using Facebook a lot.  For status messages, for sharing photos, for posting links.  But as my friend Laura talked about being so excited about getting her blog archived into print for the year, I started thinking about how transient Facebook is, and how what I'm really looking for is a record.  In addition to sharing our lives with friends and family, I would like a record.  I still go back and look at my LiveJournal and relive my college days.  But it feels like there's a bit of a hole in my record from the past for years.  And as I move into motherhood, I'm feeling how precious recordkeeping is, and I'd like to make it easy for myself.

And so, at the New Year, a time for fresh beginnings and resolutions, and inspired by my blogging friends (the above, plus Shelley and some others), here I am.  I hope to make this my record, instead of the more ephemeral Facebook.  I think I will still maintain our subject specific blogs (travel and mountaineering), and link there from here, if only for purposes of organization.

At the beginning, here we are.  We live on Pine Hill (so named by us) in the foothills nearby Denver, Colorado.  I am 23 weeks pregnant with my first child, a boy, and we are beyond excited.  Welcome to our adventure.