Saturday, January 15, 2011

in the club

I try and get to a prenatal yoga class on Thursday nights.  I say "try" because I think I'd be optimistic if I said I got there 50% of the time, but whatever.  It's the thought that counts.  

So I went this Thursday.  There were four girls there including me, and we were 23 weeks, 24 weeks, 30 weeks, and 35 weeks.  We all were sporting these cute little bumps.  As we practiced our deep frog squats with our backs at the wall, facing each other into the room, hands in anjali mudra at heart center, and practicing kegels at the same time, we were talking.  The two ladies with children and the instructor were talking about past births.  The two of us first timers were talking about birth  hopes and plans.  

And as I sat there in this circle of women, I felt, for the first time, like a part of this club.  Like I really belonged here with them.  That we could bond over discussions of our pereniums and cervixes.  And along with it a more primal feeling - that I was now joining the billions upon billions of human women who, throughout history, sat in circles, talking about birth stories and birth hopes.

And now I was in their club.

Why now?  Why, randomly, at 24 weeks?  I have been going to the yoga class (with my flat-ish stomach) since I was 5 weeks along.  I haven't passed a milestone or rite of passage, like birth.  

But I guess, having the bump has made me prouder, more aware, and more constantly conscious that yes, this is real, there is a small person - a separate being - there inside of me.  It hasn't seemed real until now.  Despite all the kicks in the bladder.


  1. I love those moments! For me it happened at different times in all of my pregnancies- but I smiled at your post remembering that moment of... WOW! I am a mom! And you are!
    Welcome to the club!

  2. Amy,
    This is the exact reason that I advocate having a woman there that can totally support you in labor. Be it your mom, or a doula, or a midwife. It is interesting, I saw part of a Nature show on PBS one time. The zoo keepers in their infinite wisdom used to separate a laboring giraffe into her own cell (it had bars and looked like a prison cell). The laboring giraffe would go nuts and start banging her head into the bars. They discovered that if they added another female giraffe (didn't matter if she was a mother yet or not) then the laboring giraffe would remain calm and labor more quickly.

    Just my two cents